Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Hearts and Minds

Today is Wednesday, 30 September 2009.

I’m tempted to start referring to Obama as “BHO”, a reference to LBJ and Vietnam, but I think I’ll wait until he issues his strategy for Afghanistan, which of course he should have had ready on Day One. After all, he’d been contemplating becoming president for years.

I’m not optimistic, particularly with today’s news that Ban Ki-moon, the buffoon and hack currently taking up space in the office of U.N Secretary General, has fired Ambassador Peter Galbraith as Deputy Special Representative in Afghanistan. Galbraith’s sin: too decently objecting to the plans of the Special Representative to assist the Obama regime in certifying the fraudulent re-election of political gangster Hamid Karzai as Afghan Duce.

Note that Galbraith had received no support from the Obama regime.

Karzai was, of course, forced on the Afghan people by W. Bush, not Obama. However, by failing to insure a clean election, and by allowing Karzai to continue his reign as president while the fix is being in put, Obama has blotted his copybook, and made Karzai his own boy.

Karzai has always been a miserable thug and opportunist. Descending from a family steeped in wealth, power, and privilege, he was an armchair mujahedeen, then a cabinet member in the Rabbani warlord regime, then a Taliban supporter, until he realized his main chance lay elsewhere, then a royalist, then an Americanist. One of his brothers is the corrupt viceroy of the Kandahar region, another handles the family heroin business. Karzai has delighted in consolidating his position by welcoming criminal warlords into his government.

Our tax dollars at work.

And let's not forget the young Afghan girl in Helmand province on 23 June.

The Royal Air Force dropped boxes of leaflets, "to win hearts and minds", and one didn't break open in mid-air. The young woman was struck and killed by the box of American propaganda.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Slaughter in Guinea

Today is Tuesday, 29 September 2009.

The army and police of the Republic of Guinea yesterday assassinated at least 200 protestors objecting to the dictator Camara’s plans to run for "elected" President. Hundreds of women were molested, raped, or kidnapped.

On 23 December 2008, six hours after state radio reported the death of the previous military dictator, Lansana Conte, Captain Moussa Dadis Camara and other low-ranking army officers seized power, styling themselves the “National Council for Democracy and Development” (“Conseil National de la Democratie et du Developpement”) or CNDD. They promised an end to tyranny and exploitation, and free elections by the end of 2010. They have delivered more tyranny and exploitation.

Camara has blamed “rogue elements” in the army and police for the latest atrocities. One can only assume the murders are as accidental and unplanned as the seizure of power in 2008.

Certainly, there was tyranny and exploitation in sub-Saharan Africa before the European colonialist period. However, the degradations and distortions introduced by the occupying powers (and continued interventions) have made the subsequent histories much, much worse. Cf. the situation in the Philippines, raped by the USA/USE.

Vito Fossella is an old-fashioned, right-wing, “family values” Republican who represented my old Staten Island district in Congress from 1998 to 2009. Vito chose not to run for re-election in ’08 after an arrest for drunk driving led to the disclosure of a lengthy extramarital affair which produced a child. (He already had a wife and children.) Vito has recently been exposing himself at public events on Staten Island, testing the waters for a possible come-back bid in 2010.

Let me suggest a slogan, Vito. “Fossella: Because We Need Another Whore in the House”.

Look great on a bumper sticker!

Monday, September 28, 2009

Safire in Hell

Today is Monday, 28 September 2009.

William Safire, speechwriter to Richard M. Nixon, is dead at 79.

Safire was the man who wrote, for the disgraced bribe-taker Spiro Agnew, such immortal phrases as “nattering nabobs of negativism” and “hopeless, hysterical hypochondriacs of history“, then later marketed himself as the Guardian of All Which Is Sacred and Holy in Language.

Safire defended Nixon during Watergate. Safire was taken aback to discover that he had been secretly taped. Safire avidly supported secretly taping others.

I was once asked if I, as one passionately committed to language, read Safire’s language column in The New York Times. “No, I needn’t read Herr Goebbels to know his values. For Herr Goebbels, language is a club with which to beat the world into submission”.

Unsatisfied with merely assisting Nixon to slaughter millions in Indochina, Safire assisted W. Bush in the latter’s attempt to conquer Iraq, and thus joined hands in the slaughter of a few million more.

I imagine Safire now, in a lower circle of hell, seated for eternity in a small room, with nothing but an uncomfortable wooden chair, listening forever to a dance mix of his speeches for Spiro Agnew.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

In Memory

Today is Saturday, 26 September 2009.

On this date in 1774, the proto-environmentalist John Chapman was born. Better known as “Johnny Appleseed”, he introduced apple trees to parts of Illinois, Indiana, and Ohio.

On this date in 1888, poet and anti-Semite T. S. Eliot was born. Despite Eliot’s bigotry and pseudo-Anglo airs, “The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock“ remains a great poem.

On this date in 1932, dissident Russian writer Vladimir Voinovich was born.

On this date in 1945, the great Hungarian composer Bela Bartok died in exile in New York City.

On this date in 1960, the first USA/USE Presidential debate occurred, between John F. Kennedy and Richard M. Nixon.

On this date in 1983, Soviet surveillance satellites reported that 5 American ICBMs had been launched at the USSR. Fortunately, the duty officer at the early warning centre, Lt. Col. Stanislav Petrov, correctly deduced that the report must be a malfunction, since an American first-strike would have involved hundreds of missiles, and had the nerve not to forward the false positive to his superiors.

Had Petrov passively sent word up the chain of command, the Soviet doctrine of launch-on-warning probably would have triggered a massive nuclear response, resulting in massive American retaliation.

And then, among other things, blogs would not have been invented.

On this date, one year ago, Paul Newman died.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

U.N. Review

Today is Thursday, 24 September 2009.

Despite many flaws, the comedy routine that “Colonel” Muammar al-Khadaffy, evita peronista dictator of Libya, debuted before the UN General Assembly yesterday wasn’t a total bomb.

For starters, that hair, that Superman hair! “Paint it black!” as the Stones sang. I understand it’s done by the same technician who did Reagan. And maybe a lady in the audience can help me: dye or rinse? (Maybe it’s Maybelline!) Though, personally, I would have gone with some vivid green highlights, to say, paraphrasing Helen Reddy, “I am Muslim, Hear me roar!”

Costume-wise, stick to uniforms. The faux Sons-of-the-Desert outfit made your ass look fat.

The face was … how can I put this kindly? …less than successful. Botox, liposuction, and nip-n-tuck don’t mix in the 21st century. Ask Joan Rivers. Muammar girl, you need to spend some major time watching Bravo. Or maybe invite Paula Abdul down to host Desert Makeover. I hear she’s got some free time.

Anywho, green highlights would have been a nice segue into the introduction before the speech, as “Leader of the Revolution, President of the African Union, the King of Kings of Africa”. Again, too understated for great comedy; the man needs to let his mojo flow! Should have added, “The Valentino of Tripoli, The Daffydil of the Desert, The Ayatollah of Rock-and-Rollah, The Greatest, al-Khadaffy Ali!”

And the monologue, Muammar … may I call you Mooey? … Leno on a bad night. “Brevity is the soul of wit”, as Idi Amin once observed. Nobody does 90-minute monologues any more, except maybe Jackie Mason, and I don’t think you want to go there.

Sure, there were some funny moments, such as “The rights of the Taliban to impose an Islamic caliphate shall not be abridged”, a clever reference to the Second Amendment, and translating the classic Abbott and Costello routine, “Who’s on first?” into Arabic and performing it to “Thriller” as a hip-hop ballad was inspired, but the JFK assassination conspiracy bit has been done to death, as it were.

And the “Where can a poor Bedouin boy like me pitch his air-conditioned tent?” subplot. Oy! It was done on Happy Days in 1977, when The Fonz jumped the shark. Didn’t work then, doesn’t work now. Marks you as a sitcom in terminal decline, and still makes your ass look fat.

Spend some time with the collected works of Mort Sahl and Bob Newhart.

Though I must confess: your 150-strong all-girl Amazon Bodyguard Corp rocks! Very 1975 Hugh Hefner. Gotta get me one of those.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

In Memory: Mary Travers

Today is Tuesday, 22 September 2009.

Some eventful days recently, here at the Museum, and I’m still trying to up catch.

Our elder Weimaraner, Lyntl, 14, had a mysterious sudden drop in blood pressure that knocked her for a loop. Still not certain what caused it, but our wonderful vet orchestrated a medicine regimen that has her back to frisky normal.

Our younger Weimar, Shelley, 11, had a tumor removed on her right leg. Low end of low-grade, and our wonderful vet surgeon got it all. She’s also frisky normal.

Then, Sunday morning, Ms. HH was diagnosed with a mild case of pneumonia. Returning to frisky normal.

So, with the 3 Patients, plus 2 healthy canines and a healthy feline, just Keeping the Home Fires Burning has required some serious stoking.

So, it’s just now, I can compose myself enough to express the great sorrow of The Museum of the Bourgeois at the death, on Wednesday last, of Mary Travers, of Peter, Paul and Mary. A great artist, and a tireless campaigner against racism and war.

Fare thee well.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Tea Bummers: Unsafe At Any Speed

Today is Sunday, 20 September 2009.

Proposal being debated: That all Americans shall be required by law to purchase health insurance. Those failing to comply would be fined.

Desperate tea bummers claim: fines would be a hidden tax, and therefore EVIL!

Current situation: it is illegal to exceed speed limit while driving, and the consequence is often a fine.

Question to desperate tea bummers: is a fine for speeding a hidden tax, and therefore EVIL, and should be repealed?

Hope ya crash and burn!

Friday, September 18, 2009


Today is Friday, 18 September 2009.

It's 2.55am, and it would be much funnier if this country weren't 37th in health care.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Good Morning!

Today is Tuesday, 15 September 2009.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Heil Ron Paul!

Today is Monday, 14 September 2009.

For years, Rep. Ron Paul (R-TX) made no secret of his rabid anti-Semitic and Aryan supremacist views, trumpeting them openly in his political newsletter.

Although Paul never had the decency and courage to directly sign his filth, he was sole controller of his newsletter’s content, very few other persons ever wrote articles in it and those were always signed, so the lack of his signatures was simply an insultingly coy way to spread his sewer bigotry, while maintaining a smirking fan dance of “implausible deniability”. (And, of course, pocketing a tidy profit from his pro-extermination-camp rantings.)

This morning on CNN, Paul claimed that “The President of the Federal Reserve probably has more power than the President of the United States.” The anti-Semitic line has long been that all major financial institutions are controlled by “The Jew”, and Paul here merely repeats the Hitler line in the code language beloved of cowardly bigots. His fellow neo-Nazis have no doubt of what he meant.

It is disgraceful that Paul is offered a national outlet, without even the weak measure of being accurately identified as a “professional anti-Semite”. Shame on CNN and any other media which gives him such a forum.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

In Memory: Attica

Today is Sunday, 13 September 2009.

On this date in 1971, the Attica Prison Rebellion was crushed in a massive assault by New York State Police, corrections officers, and civilian vigilantes (former corrections officers).

The Rebellion stemmed from the extremely inhumane conditions at the prison, ranging from indignities such as a ration of one (1) roll of toilet paper per inmate per month, to regular beatings (with batons many corrections officers nick-named “Nigger Sticks”), and torture.

Attica then held 2,225 inmates, of whom 54% were Black, and 9% were Puerto Rican. Of 383 correctional officers, 383 were white.

Of 37 killed in the assault, twenty-four were inmates murdered by indiscriminate police gunfire, nine were hostages murdered by indiscriminant police gunfire, and four were inmates murdered by other inmates.

The attack was ordered by Governor Nelson Rockefeller, who had refused to negotiate in good faith with the inmates. One can only conclude that Rockefeller, the son of a Gilded Age economic gangster, saw the Rebellion as an insult to himself, who fancied himself a patrician and a “prince of the blood”, an insult which could be assuaged only by the blood of the rebels.

Most of the surviving inmates were subjected to several days of indiscriminate beatings and torture.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Tea Party Blood Suckers

Today is Saturday, 12 September 2009.

Several tens of thousands of Tea Party takers goosestepped into Washington, D.C. today, demanding less Federal government that will lavish more goodies upon them.

These anti-rationalists are the political equivalent of someone who wants to downsize from a Ferrari to a tricycle, but still go 150 m.p.h.

The Tea Party takers hate socialized medicine, but they can’t bloat up enough on socialized highways, socialized food, socialized military, socialized drinkable water, and socialized non-toxic air. Paid for by someone else, of course.

That’s right, grabbers: society creates those goodies through the political instrument of government. For the process to work, everyone must pay a fair share.

If you hate society so much, leave quickly. Take nothing but the clothes on your back, since the opportunities here are the common creation of society, not the ex nihilo fabrications of losers like you who demand to be treated like asinine gods.

Good riddance to parasitic nihilists.

On this date in 1933, physicist Leo Szilard conceived of the nuclear chain reaction.

On this date in 1940, the great cave paintings at Lascaux, France were discovered. They are estimated to be ca. 16,000 years old.

On this date in 1944, the wrongfully imprisoned Native American leader, Leonard Peltier, was born.

On this date in 1959, the first regularly scheduled color TV program premiered: Bonanza.

On this date in 1977, anti-apartheid leader Steve Biko was murdered by South African police.

Also on this date in 1977, poet Robert Lowell died.

Friday, September 11, 2009

In Memory

Today is Friday, 11 September 2009.

On this date in 1973, the Nixon terrorist regime, acting through a military coup, overthrew the democratically elected government of Chile, installing a murderous dictatorship.

On this date in 2001, al-Qaeda terrorists, led by Reagan terrorist regime protégé Osama bin Laden, made the “9-11” attacks.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Admit It Ain't So, Joe

Today remains Thursday, 10 September 2009.

Obviously, Rep. “Joe” Wilson (R – SC), the poltroon who last night shouted “You lie!” at President Obama, could use some advice.

If you’re an elected public employee attending a Presidential Address to a Joint Session of Congress, meth is dessert, not an appetizer.

It’s not that I object to shouting at Presidents in certain instances. The President is not a monarch, but an employee of the citizens. The Legislative and Executive branches would each benefit from the free-wheeling ways of the Mother of Parliaments in London, where witty, pithy, and penetrating comments, taunts, and insults are regularly hurled at the Prime Minister and other speakers. If adopted here, the custom in the Republic of Korea, fisticuffs, might prove salutary.

One ground rule: tell the truth. The Democratic Party proposals for health care reform do not mandate coverage of “illegal” immigrants, as Wilson and other craven miscreants allege.

Mr. Wilson: You lie. Go to hell. Swiftboatly.

Note: “Joe” is an alias. The birth and legal name is “Addison Graves Wilson, Sr.” Mayhap he thought the latter was excessively “Thurston J. Howell III” for South Carolina Republican politics. Wilson would have done better to have chosen, instead of the plebian and plumberesque “Joe”, something more belligerent and manly, such as “Biff”, “Dick”, or “Deadeye”.

Note: A. G. Wilson, Sr. is a former aide to the late white supremacist racist senator of ill repute, Strom Thurmond.

Note: Obama should have said, “That boy has got his sheet together!”

Wednesday, September 09, 2009


Today is Thursday, 10 September 2009.

Bill O’Reilly (AKA “Bill O’Heily”) is a robotically-created artificial “intelligence” (A”I”), currently hosting a prime-time politi-porn show on the Fox Network. (Cf. “Julius Streicher”.)

His date of origination is given as this date in 1949.

Many believe he was a failed attempt to create Max Headroom, or perhaps Ron Headrest, and escaped the confines of a GZK-9000 supercomputer, becoming a Web rogue. Mayhap he currently resides on a server in Orange County, California.

Max Headroom interlude:

O’Heily’s simulacrum was involved (see court records) in a notorious incident of sexual harassment, in which he, by landline phone, recounted, in sexcruciating detail, to a female, how he would pleasure her (while showering with her), with a “falafel”, though obviously he meant a “loofah”. (“And so it goes”, when one has no physical form. “You say “falafel”, I say “Parsifal”. Let's call the whole thing OFF.)

Seems the creature has a temperamentature, as in this excerpt from his/its hit Broadway show, fuck it! Fuck It! Do It: LIVE!.

And that's how the rat ate the radish.

"Thanks for watching".

Tuesday, September 08, 2009


Today is Tuesday, 8 September 2009.

Today, the German parliament “somewhat” belatedly revoked all sentences, including death, against the last resisters to Nazism whose sentences had stood: members of the German military who had understood the crimes of their country, and deserted.

Of course, many had been murdered more than sixty years ago, and most of the rest are dead, but wasn’t the tardy gesture “special”?

Revocation had been delayed by German right-wingers, who argued the deserters had failed their comrades, and set the stage for future failing to support comrades. (As in, “when we light the ovens again”.)

Today is also the anniversary of the day in 1974 when Gerald Ford pardoned Richard Nixon, thus completing the final act of covering-up in the “Watergate” treason. Five goose-steps to Gerald for prizing the RepubliKlan Party above his country. Support your local criminal comrade!

On this date in 1966, Star Trek premieres on NBC.

“Live long and prosper.”

Monday, September 07, 2009

In Labor

Today is Monday, 7 September 2009.

Until this date one mere year ago, everyone, save for incorrigible leftists such as myself, “knew” that the age of severe boom-and-bust cycles in capitalism had long gone the way of the dinosaurs.

That is, until the government decreed nationalization of home mortgage loan guarantors Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. Followed eight days later by the Bush-Cheney/Cheney-Bush regime’s incredibly stupid, ideologically driven decision allowing the Lehman Brothers brokerage to collapse into bankruptcy, triggering the worst global financial crisis since 1929, and almost returning the world financial system to the Middle Ages.

All of which can be traced back to the fatal birth of the Obama-socialist dictatorship on 20 January 2009, which tomorrow will begin the conquest of the minds of America’s children, when the Kenyan-born “President” will give said kiddies the insidious advice to stay in school and study hard. (Code for “unplug Grandma” and “open the borders to the colored hordes”.) On Wednesday, Kim Jong-Obama will announce that Beautiful Black is the new white, and impose segregation on the Old Whites.

Fasten your tin-foil hats, kids, it’s gonna be a bumpy ride.

And that’s how the cow ate the cabbage.

Saturday, September 05, 2009

Yo: Teacher's Day

Today is 5 September 2009.

In India, today is "Teacher's Day".

As of this date, in 1946, by mysterious decree, this day is thus designated universally.

Ms. Teach, this is 4 U:

Friday, September 04, 2009

New Iranian Purges?

Today is Friday, 4 September 2009.

“Many of the humanities and liberal arts are based on philosophies whose foundations are materialism and disbelief in godly and Islamic teachings,” said Ayatollah Khamenei on Sunday past, in his best imitation of Pat Robertson.

A recent and ongoing barrage of such remarks by government and clerical thugs at all levels indicates that another purge of the Iranian higher education system is in the offing.

After the Khomeini coup of 1979, the universities were closed for a time and faculties and student bodies “cleansed” of dissidents. Khomeini attempted to end the teaching of everything but the natural sciences. This endeavour foundered on the opposition of faculty and students, and the regime's grudging recognition that Iran could not remain a regional power in the 20th century with a 13th century university system. Purges were again widespread during the first term of Ahmadinejad.

Resistance to further purges may be widespread, given that more than 2/3rds of Iran’s population is 30 and under.

Story at:

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

The Ninety-Two Years War

Today is Wednesday, 2 September 2009.

On this date in 1945, the Ninety-Two Years War between the USA/USE and Japan ended, when representatives of the Japanese government signed instruments of surrender on the deck of the battleship U.S.S. Missouri, anchored in Tokyo Bay.

The war began on 8 July 1853, when an American war fleet, commanded by Commodore Matthew Perry, arrived at Uraga Harbour, near Edo, Japan, on a mission to force Japanese markets to open themselves to American manufactures. Then, as now, the reckless boom-and-bust nature of American capitalism required privileged access to foreign markets.

The American aggression triggered the long competition for mastery of the Pacific Basin between the USA/USE and the Empire of Japan, culminating in open hostilities on 7 December 1941.

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Down With Libyan Dictatorship

Today is Tuesday, 1 September 2009.

On this date in 1969, the Libyan military, led by Muammar Gaddafi, seized power.

Gaddafi and his thugs have always pretended to be guided by his “Third Universal Theory” of Islamic socialism and Arab nationalism, or some such nonsense. In fact, they’ve always been a gang of vicious Peronist poseurs, trampling the Libyan people and impoverishing them by thievery.

Herewith, the salute of the Museum of the Bourgeois on this 40th anniversary, courtesy of Spike Jones and his City Slickers:

Also, the "Brother Leader and Guide of the Revolution" has the fashion sense of a cheap white pimp, as can be seen here:

On this date in 1939, the Second Great European War began.